Let kids be kids is a saying I heard a lot of over my life time. Let them laugh, play, make fart jokes and get dirty. Let them fight (not physically) and make mistakes, break toys and eat with their fingers. Let girls wear pants and boys wear dresses. Right?
I choose to live along the lines of the above. My kids can be taught a lot of things but not how to love a certain way or a certain sex.
We shop at Walmart a lot. It’s a way for the kids to run off their energy and for me to shop. Sure I end up spending a bit more than I want to but it all works out for the better in the end. One day we were in the girls section and Kylan says he wants to put a dress on. He pointed to the dress and said,
I confirmed with him that he indeed wanted it on so I did just that. The minute I put it on, he got angry and wanted it off. That was that. Until a few days ago when he saw Kinsley in her Elsa dress. They often play together now and that entails lots of princesses, PJ Mask characters and race cars. Since he can speak much better now, when she came out in her dress, he told me he wanted the Anna dress. I knew right away that he was going to lose his mind once I put it on but was willing to give it a chance.
He twirls around, does a screech and starts hopping through the living room running to his sister yelling,
“Hey Elsa, where are you?”
Kinsley was excited; I had never seen her so happy before. They played Elsa and Anna for the rest of the night until it was time to go to bed then he wanted it off. The next day after coming through the door from work, he asked me where it was. I had to go to Walmart so I told him I would find it later, but he wasn’t having it. He wanted to wear it now.
After finding the dress, I realized that I was heading to Walmart, the place where you can see everything and anything when it comes to people and now I would be one of those people. I didn’t care – I thought it was cute but I figured I’d get a few looks from folks passing by and I had thought they would all come from men.
The trip was fun aside from the absolute meltdown he had in the middle of the floor where everyone seemed to flock to. The men gave a giggle and thought it was cute while the women gave me the nastiest looks. I had one woman standing in front of me at the customer service desk, she looked at him, looked at me and spoke to her daughter about how the boy was wearing a dress. I found it interesting how when I was defending my actions and my son being dressed up, she had no rebuttal.
People – it’s 2019. It’s not like he is hurting you or hurting others, he wasn’t screaming (at least not at that point) and wasn’t acting a fool – he was minding his own business enjoying the fun with his sister.
This whole notion that I am teaching him “how to be gay” is hilarious. By letting a boy or girl dress in the opposite sex’ clothing doesn’t teach them anything.
When your parents made you eat vegetables that you hated for years on end, did you magically turn your disgust into a love of those disgusting Brussel sprouts? When the school system made you learn math but had no interest in it, did it make you love math and strive to be a math teacher?
I feel like it’s safe to say….no. Unless you were destined to be a math teacher or to love vegetables, unless it’s inside of you to love that, I am positive you didn’t make the turn. The same goes for this. Letting a boy or girl dress-up differently won’t make them anything. However, if they are gay in any sort, letting them explore and be who they want to be will only help them feel more comfortable and safe growing up learning how to be themselves and love themselves as they are.
I will forever let my children do what they want so long as they don’t hurt others, animals or things in the process and I will be happy to see them grow up knowing that no matter what, their Mom had their back and would be supportive of anything positive they were doing for themselves and others.